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====> Welcome to JokesUncut
=====> Seriously Scottish Adult Jokes For The
Whole Clan
======> Owned by http://www.GreatWorldMedia.com
=======> Unsubscribe Instructions at the bottom
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INTRODUCTION:
Happy New Year to all of you! I hope you had a
great
Christmas and New Year. I had my family over on
New Years
Day for dinner. My niece was a little brat... a
four-year-old who bursts into tears every time she
doesn't
get her own way or when someone tells her off. Her
mother
always then gives her her own way to stop her
crying...
really wrong as far as I'm concerned.
I'll draw your attention to todays ad for 20
Disney films
for $20... great for yourself, for presents, to
sell on
eBay or to sell at car boot sales. If I lived in
the USA
it's an opportunity I wouldn't miss. The URL in
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Have a great day and don't break those New Year
resolutions!
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
The general went to the doctor for a physical.
Before he began, the doctor asked him the
standard questions -- age, height, weight,
and then he asked when was the last time
the general had sex.
'Oh,' he mused, 'It was 1945.'
'Isn't that a long time to go without sex?' the
doctor asked.
'I don't think so. According to your clock it's
only 21:13.
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CARTOON TIME:
On One Of His Moods
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200410/010.htm
Strange Tree
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200410/011.htm
Creating A Scene
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200410/012.htm
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FUN PAGE
Todays game involves shooting some moving targets.
Camper Strike...
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/camper.htm
A New York Christmas...
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=210&pid=5001&s=n
A Purr-Fect Kiss...
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=210&pid=3634&s=n
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DONATION
A man and a woman were waiting at the hospital
donation center.
Man: "What are you doing here today?"
Woman: "Oh, I'm here to donate some blood. They're
going to
give me $5 for it."
Man: "Hmm, that's interesting. I'm here to donate
sperm,
myself. But they pay me $25."
The woman looked thoughtful for a moment and they
chatted some
more before going their separate ways.
About a week later, the same man and woman meet
again in the
donation center.
Man: "Oh, hi there! Here to donate blood again?"
Woman: "Unh unh," she replies, her mouth tightly
closed.
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PUNISHMENT
A young female teacher was giving an assignment to
her Grade
6 class one day. It was a large assignment so she
started
writing high up on the chalkboard. Suddenly there
was a giggle
from one of the boys in the class.
She quickly turned and asked, "What's so funny
Pat?"
"Well teacher, I just saw one of your garters."
"Get out of my classroom," she yells, "I don't
want to see you
for three days."
The teacher turns back to the chalkboard.
Realising she had
forgotten to title the assignment; she reaches to
the very top
of the chalkboard. Suddenly there is an even
louder giggle from
another male student. She quickly turns and asks,
"What's so
funny Billy?"
"Well miss, I just saw both of your garters."
Again she yells, "Get out of my classroom!" This
time the
punishment is more severe, "I don't want to see
you for three
weeks."
Embarrassed and frustrated, she drops the eraser
when she turns
around again. So she bends over to pick it up.
This time there
is an burst of laughter from another male student.
She quickly
turns to see Little Johnny leaving the classroom.
"Where do you think you are going?" she asks.
"Well teacher, from what I just saw, my school
days are over."
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