| |
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *
====> Welcome to JokesUncut
=====> Seriously Scottish Adult Jokes For The
Whole Clan
======> Owned by http://www.GreatWorldMedia.com
=======> Unsubscribe Instructions at the bottom
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
* ~ * ~ *
<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR'
<><><><><><><><>
ENTER the worlds BIGGEST SEX TOY warehouse!!!
Realistic Dongs, Vibrators, Massagers, Toys For
Men,
Love Dolls, Anal Stimulators, Bondage Fantasy,
Lubes,
Lotions, Videos, DVDs, Erotic Clothing, Novelties,
Games
and a vast array of Condoms!
If you've never seen so much as a dildo then
things like
ejaculating anal butt plugs will really blow your
mind!
Come and have a peek, you'll be amazed at what you
see!!!
http://www.greatworldmedia.com/offers/sextoysex.htm
<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR'
<><><><><><><><>
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-
INTRODUCTION:
Well, I hope everyone had as fabulous a weekend as
I did.
I've been feeling not too bad so have been glad to
make the
most of it. I had a great time at church, nice
lunch out at
a friends house yesterday and back to church in
the evening.
Today it was tea at Lizzies Mums which is why I'm
late with
this... this morning we booked tickets for to go
and see
Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat on
Wednesday
starring Darren Day. On the 17th we're going to
see Jason
Byrne who's an excellent Irish stand-up comedian.
I'm
trying to persuade Lizzie to let me book tickets
to go and
see Kevin Bloody Wilson but she's not having any
of it at
the moment... still a few days left to work on it
though
before it's too late.
I will be praying that God guides the American
people to
make the right decision tomorrow... I'm sure he's
very sad
to see such a wicked tyrant using religion as an
excuse to
illegally invade a country whos people have not
asked to
be invaded and say every day how they dislike it.
Hopefully
he'll be tried for war crimes... he provokes all
the
terrorists with every move he makes every day.
Take care and have a great day... everyone get out
and
vote!
Phil
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-
QUICK JOKE
A guy walks into a clinic to have his blood taken
to test his choloesteral. The blonde and very
buxuom
nurse went about taking the blood sample from his
finger. After finishing she looked around for a
piece of cotton to wipe away the excess blood. She
couldn't find one so she looked innocently at the
guy, took his finger and sucked it.
The guy was so pleased he asked, "Do you think I
could have a urine test done?"
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-
CARTOON TIME:
Indian Charm
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200409/004.htm
Protected Sex
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200409/005.htm
Blind-folded Sex
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200409/006.htm
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-
FUN PAGE
Naughty or Nice?
http://www.jokesunlimited.com/cltr.php?id=127
Da Numba
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/danumba/index.htm
Random Fun Page...
http://www.ezines4all.com/fun/random.htm
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-
<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR'
<><><><><><><><>
Have you noticed your computer running slower than
ever?
The reason for that may have to do with online
advertisers
adding SpyWare or AdWare to your computer without
your
knowledge. "Spyware" is a common term for files
that are
installed on your system without your knowledge
that allow
companies to monitor your Internet activity. "AdWare"
is
software that will show you popup ads over and
over. What
they don't tell you, however, is how these files
can be
extremely dangerous to your PC and could cause
major
problems with your PC.
We are offering every computer owner, including
yourself,
the opportunity to scan your computer to see how
many
"SpyWare" infections your PC has free of charge.
To scan your computer for free, click here:
http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/trekblue8
<a href="http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/trekblue8">
Here </a>
Our goal is to put an end to shady online
advertising so
that Internet users can enjoy the World Wide Web
without
having their privacy intruded upon.
We urge you to run the free scan!
Click Here To Begin Scan:
http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/trekblue8
<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR'
<><><><><><><><>
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-
FIRST CONTACT
Two aliens landed in the West Texas desert near an
abandoned gas
station. They approached one of the gas pumps, and
one of the aliens
addressed it. "Greetings, Earthling. We come in
peace. Take us to your
leader." The gas pump, of course, didn't respond.
The alien repeated the
greeting. There was no response. The alien,
annoyed by what he perceived
to be the gas pump's haughty attitude, drew his
ray gun, and said
impatiently, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in
peace. How dare you
ignore us in this way! Take us to your leader, or
I'll fire!" The other
alien shouted to his comrade "No, you don't want
to make him mad!" But
before he finished his warning, the first alien
fired. There was a huge
explosion that blew both of them 1200 feet into
the desert, where they
landed in a heap. When they finally regained
consciousness, the one who
fired turned to the other one and said, "What a
ferocious creature. It
damn near killed us! How did you know it was so
dangerous?" The other
alien answered, "If there's one thing I've learned
during my travels
through the galaxy ... any guy who can wrap his
penis around himself
twice and then stick it in his own ear, is someone
you shouldn't mess
with."
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-
<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR'
<><><><><><><><>
FIND OUT THE TRUTH ABOUT ANYONE!
NetDetective is an amazing new tool that allows
you to dig
up facts about anyone. It is all completely legal,
and you
can use it in the privacy of the own home without
anyone
ever knowing. It's cheaper and faster than hiring
a private
investigator.
* Locate anyone's e-mail address, phone number or
address.
* Verify your own credit reports so you can
correct wrong
information.
* Find debtors and locate hidden assets.
* Check driving and criminal records.
* Reunite with old classmates, a missing family
member, a
long-lost love.
* Prevent identity theft.
Satisfaction guaranteed or your money back.
http://www.greatworldmedia.com/offers/netdet.htm
<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR'
<><><><><><><><>
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-
BLONDE EDUCATION DEPARTMENT
The Blondes at the university were tired of not
fitting
in. They were tired of other students assuming
they were
just stupid bimbos. They wanted somewhere where
they felt
they belonged.
So they pressured the administration to set up a
new
Department especially for them. The university
agreed,
and set up the Blonde Education Department.
The Blondes were ecstatic to have a department of
their own where they
could gather without being ridiculed. They felt
they really belonged
now.
They wanted other students to see that they
weren't just
stupid bimbos-- after all, they now had their own
department at the university.
So they now all proudly wear the official
sweatshirt of
the Blonde Education Department which sports the
saying:
"I Belong in B.E.D."
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-
<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR'
<><><><><><><><>
Would you like to test and keep valuable products?
Join eMarket Research Group as a product tester
and receive
a Sony CD Digital Camera - yours to keep!
http://1.primaryads.com/z/3272/CD876/
Featuring a Carl Zeiss™ Zoom Lens, the Sony Mavica®
Digital
Camera offers 5.0 Megapixel mage capture.
Record photos directly onto CDs!
The retail price is up to $599, but can be yours
to keep at
no cost.
http://www.greatworldmedia.com/offers/primary385.htm
<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR'
<><><><><><><><>
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.- |
