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=====> Seriously Scottish Adult Jokes For The
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INTRODUCTION:
Someone I know had a birthday recently so I made
her a
lovely card which I thought I'd share with you. If
anyone
you know has a birthday coming soon then feel free
to share
this card with them.
http://www.ezines4all.com/pics/happybirthday.htm
Take care and have a fantastic day!
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
One day a teacher told her student's to make a
sentence
using the math terms add, subtract, divide,
multiply.
When time was over she called on a student named
Johnny.
He said, "this is the process of having sex. First
you add
the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and
hope you
don't multiply.
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CARTOON TIME:
High Blood Pressure
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200408/034.htm
A Pleasure To Serve You
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200408/035.htm
Cupid Playing Tricks
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200408/036.htm
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FUN PAGE
Todays game is really fun to play but is
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Space Fighter...
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Random Fun Page...
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DOG AND CAT CHARACTERISTICS
Dogs come when you call them. Cats take a message
and get back to you when
they are good and ready.
Dogs look much better at the end of a leash.
Dogs will let you give them a bath without taking
out a contract on your
life.
Dogs will bark to wake you up if the house is on
fire. Cats will quietly
sneak out the back door.
Dogs will bring you your slippers or the evening
newspaper. Cats might bring
you a dead mouse.
Dogs will play Frisbee with you all afternoon.
Cats will take a three-hour
nap.
Dogs will sit on the car seat next to you. Cats
have to have their own
private box or they will not go at all.
Dogs will greet you and lick your face when you
come home from work. Cats
will be mad that you went to work at all.
Dogs will sit, lie down, and heel on command. Cats
will smirk and walk away.
Dogs will tilt their heads and listen whenever you
talk. Cats will yawn and
close their eyes.
Dogs will give you unconditional love forever.
Cats will make you pay for
every mistake you've ever made since the day you
were born.
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THE RULES OF BEDROOM GOLF
1. Each player shall furnish his own equipment for
play - normally one club
and two balls.
2. Play on a course must be approved by the owner
of
the hole.
3. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the
club in the hole and keep
the balls out.
4. For most effective play, the club should have a
firm shaft. Course owners
are permitted to check shaft stiffness before play
begins.
5. Course owners reserve the right to restrict
club length to avoid damage to
the hole.
6. The object of the game is to take as many
strokes as necessary until the
course owner is satisfied that play is complete.
Failure to do so may result
in being denied permission to play the course
again.
7. It is considered bad form to begin playing the
hole immediately upon
arrival at the course. The experienced player will
normally take time to
admire the entire course with special attention to
well formed bunkers.
8. Players are cautioned not to mention other
courses they have played, or
are currently playing, to the owner of the course
being played. Upset course
owners have been known to damage players equipment
for this reason.
9. Players are encouraged to bring proper rain
gear for their own protection.
10. Players should ensure themselves that their
match has been properly
scheduled, particularly when a new course is being
played for the first time.
Previous players have been known to become irate
if they discover someone else
playing on what they considered to be a private
course.
11. Players should not assume a course is in shape
for play at all times.
Some players may be embarrassed if they find the
course to be temporarily
under repair. Players are advised to be extremely
tactful in this situation.
More advanced players will find alternative means
of play when this is the
case.
12. The course owner is responsible for manicuring
and pruning any bush
around the hole to allow for improved viewing of,
alignment with, and
approach to the hole.
13. Players are advised to obtain the course
owners permission before
attempting to play the back nine.
14. Slow play is encouraged. However, players
should be prepared to proceed
at a quicker pace, at least temporarily, at the
course owners request.
15. It is considered outstanding performance, time
permitting, to play the
same hole several times in one match
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