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====> Welcome to JokesUncut
=====> Seriously Scottish Adult Jokes For The
Whole Clan
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It's amazing what you can do with a REMOTE
CONTROL...
Mini Stunt Cars and Mini Racers
Electric Shock FAKE Remote Control
Sound Activated SPIDER - Hear people scream!
Remote Control Flipper - A Hand That Gives The
Finger
Bulls**t Detector and Fart Alarms
ANNOYING Sound Machines and FART Machines
FILTHY Phrases Machine - shouts Obscene Things Out
Remote Control MOUSE - Terify Women as it runs
past them
http://www.greatworldmedia.com/gagsplus11.htm
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INTRODUCTION:
Lorraine seems to like seeing dogs dressed up in
human
clothes and other silly costumes so she asked me
to put up
this page. I have no idea what to make of it... I
bet all
the woman type folks will go 'awww, that's cute'.
Here goes:
http://www.ezines4all.com/pics/dogthoughts/index.htm
I hope that hasn't ruined your day too much :-)
For the guys I've got something far more useful,
it's a
'Handy' calender clock, far more manly!
http://www.ezines4all.com/fun/calendarclock.htm
Have a great day!
Phil
PS... None of you chicks send me emails sticking
up for
Lorraine and her 'cute' pictures.
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QUICK JOKE
No Nativity Scene In Washington D.C This Year
The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a
nativity scene in Washington, DC this Christmas.
This isn't for any religious constitutional
reason.
They simply have not been able to find three wise
men
and a virgin in the Nation's capitol.
There was no problem however finding enough asses
to
fill the stable.
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CARTOON TIME:
Cheap Condos
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200408/019.htm
New Fire Alarm
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200408/020.htm
Need For An Umbrella
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200408/021.htm
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FUN PAGE
I'm just glad I wasn't doing this in real life
otherwise
I'd be in intensive care right now. I'm as fond of
a ride
on a rollercoaster as anyone but when it comes to
any kind
of extreme sport you can count me out!
Snowboarding...
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/snowboardingxs/index.htm
Random Fun Page...
http://www.ezines4all.com/fun/random.htm
Find The Black Dot
http://www.ezines4all.com/fun/dot.htm
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How To Have The Best Sex Humanly Possible - By
Gary Halbert
If you are interested in having an absolutely
incredible
sex life, there is a new book (just published)
that has the
most exciting secrets you will ever read.
But, here's a warning: Before you request your
copy of the
book, you better know some of the secrets revealed
in it.
You see, the author of the book doesn't want to
embarrass
anyone... or... make them feel uncomfortable in
any way. So,
if your deep religious beliefs, your ultra
conservative
upbringing or, if you have "personal reasons"
against
having great sex... you probably should NOT read
this
book.
http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/giftfunds
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INDIFFERENT
One day, during English class, Miss Figpot asked
her
class, "Who can tell me the meaning of
indifferent?"
The class fidgets a little, and they all look at
one another.
No one knows. Finally, Little Johnny puts up his
hand.
The teacher, hesitant to call on him because of
his
propensity for foul language and sexual innuendo,
looks
for another student to ask. Finally, when no one
else
raises their hand, she says, "Yes, Johnny?"
"Miss Figpot, it means lovely."
Relieved, but a little puzzled, the teacher says,
"Johnny,
can you explain why you think indifferent means
lovely?"
"Sure, teach. Last night when I was in bed, I
heard
Mommy say, 'That's lovely'. Then Daddy said, 'Yep,
it's in
different.'"
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Mole, Wart & Skin Tag Free In 3 Days
Do You Want To Have...
Freedom from the pain and irritation of your
unsightly moles,
warts or skin tags?
No more endless days of fighting a losing battle
with these
problems? To wake up and enjoy the rest of your
day knowing
your skin is clear and pain-free, and STAYS that
way?
http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/molewartfr
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STATUE
A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard
her husband
opening the front door.
"Hurry!" she said, "Stand in the corner." She
quickly rubbed
baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with
talcum
powder.
"Don't move until I tell you to." she whispered.
"Just
pretend you're a statue."
"What's this, honey?" the husband asked as he
entered the
room.
"Oh, it's just a statue." she replied
nonchalantly. "The
Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked the
idea so
much, I got one for us, too."
No more was said about the "statue".
Later that night when they went to sleep. Around
two in the
morning the husband got out of bed, went into the
kitchen,
and returned with a sandwich and a glass of milk.
"Here." he said to the 'statue'. "Eat this. I
stood like an
idiot at the Smiths for three days and nobody
offered me so
much as a glass of water."
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43-Year Arthritis Sufferer Shocks Her Doctors
By Curing Her Arthritis...
Naturally Without Expensive Medication Or Surgery!
"I Cured My Arthritis You Can Too"
Over 241,987 Copies Sold
http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/arthritis
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