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====> Welcome to JokesUncut
=====> Seriously Scottish Adult Jokes For The
Whole Clan
======> Owned by http://www.GreatWorldMedia.com
=======> Unsubscribe Instructions at the bottom
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INTRODUCTION:
On Thursday I spent the day setting up a PC for
Lizzie and
then trying to teach her how to use it. This was
complicated
by the fact that she hates computers and lacks any
confidence in her own abilities to learn... if you
believe
you can't do something then that can really
prevent you
doing it. A further complication is the fact that
she's
blind and the world of computers is very
graphically
orientated... more than you could ever know. Have
you ever
tried working your computer without using a mouse?
Ohhh, and
without looking at the monitor either? It can be
quite
tricky. You can get screen-reading software called
'Jaws'
which reads out the text on the screen (to a
certain extent)
but you have to use the keyboard to navigate the
screen and
tell Jaws what to read... also have you ever tried
clicking
on a hyperlink without using a mouse? You'd be
surprised
just how difficult it is to do even the most basic
of things
without a mouse... blind people have to learn all
sorts of
keyboard commands. What can be done with one mouse
click
often involves a tedious series of keyboard
commands
delayed by the fact you have to listen to the
screen
reader to let you know where you're at and what
you're
doing. So blind people aren't just slowed down by
the fact
they can't glance and things or they can't use a
mouse to
do things they also have to LEARN a whole lot more
than
anyone else plus use their ears for something that
was
designed for their eyes and use the keyboard for
tasks
designed for the mouse. Ouch!
I'm just glad I can still see well enough to see
my monitor!
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
When the surgeon came to see his blonde patient on
the day
after her operation, she asked him somewhat
hesitantly just
how long it would be before she could resume her
sex life.
"Uh, I hadn't really thought about it" replied the
stunned
surgeon. "You're the first one ever to ask that
after a
tonsillectomy."
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CARTOON TIME:
Musical Faces
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200407/052.htm
Women Vs KFC
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200407/053.htm
Gods Gift To Man
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200407/054.htm
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FUN PAGE
This is a fun little platform game which is going
to be a
distraction for a while for people of all ages.
Red Beard...
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/redbeard/index.htm
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CALL FOR HELP FROM HELL
Sister Margaret died and through some error found
herself
in hell. She immediately called Saint Peter and
said,
"This is Sister Margaret. There's been a terrible
mistake!"
She explained the situation, and Saint Peter said
he'd get
right on it.
The next day the nun didn't hear from Saint Peter
so she
called him again. "Please set this error straight
before
tomorrow," she begged. "There's an orgy planned
for
tonight, and everyone *must* attend!"
"Of course, Sister," he said. "I'll get you out of
there
right away."
Apparently, her plight slipped his mind, and the
following
morning Saint Peter received another phone call
from hell.
He picked up the receiver with tribulations of his
heart
and started to listen.
He heard the following, "Hey, Pete, this is
Maggie. Never
mind!"
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RUNNING EAGLE
During a quick stop off for a photo opportunity at
the
Apache Nation, Republican presidential candidate
George W.
Bush said he had a plan - as a compassionate
conservative
-to increase every Native American's income by
$137 a year
if he were re-elected.
President Bush refused repeated requests for
details of
his plan, however. He did tell the Apaches that
during his
years as Governor of Texas, he had voted Yes for
every
Indian issue ever introduced in the legislature.
Before his departure, the Apache Tribe presented
the
President with a plaque inscribed with his new
Indian
name, Running Eagle.
After Dubya left, tribal officials explained that
Running
Eagle is a bird so full of crap it can't fly.
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