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====> Welcome to JokesUncut
=====> Seriously Scottish Adult Jokes For The
Whole Clan
======> Owned by http://www.GreatWorldMedia.com
=======> Unsubscribe Instructions at the bottom
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Shocking Pranks
Browse the largest selection of shocking pranks on
the
internet! We have it all - from Ball Point Pens to
4
player party games! You'll have a blast with these
pranks, guaranteed. Be warned: these items all
give a
nice little jolt, no wimpy static discharges like
other
similar items you'll find, these are the real
deal!
The Huge Hit Game 'Lightning Reaction' and other
games
like 'Shock Roulette' and the 'Shock Wire Game'
And all these items below are $10 or less...
Shocking Pistol, Tape Measure, Cigarette Pack,
Chewing
Gum, Key Chain Digital Camera, Calculator,
Stapler,
Remote Control, Book, Pen, Computer Mouse,
Lighter,
Door Bell, Mini Slot Machine, Beer Can
Buy individual items or get any 3 for just $25
http://www.greatworldmedia.com/gagsplus21.htm
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INTRODUCTION:
To repeat what I said yesterday...
Lots of AOL users have been writing to me saying
that
they've been receiving messages telling them that
mail to
them is bouncing yet they've been getting every
issue. What
is happening is that when mail bounces the server
attempts
to deliver the mail again and usually it gets
through on the
2nd attempt. The 'ezmlm' is a probe to check that
your
mailbox is active. You can ignore these messages
because the
fact that you receive them prooves that your mail
is ok.
I've also been experimenting recently with
Interstitial ads,
these are big ads you see when you click on a link
and there
is a delay in you going to the page you want to.
I've now
taken these down as I think they cause annoyance
when people
are trying to browse the site. I will use them
only on some
external links from now on.
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
There once was a girl from Peru,
Who had nothing better to do,
Than to sit on the stairs,
And count pubic hairs,
Fourthousandthreehundredandtwo!
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CARTOON TIME:
Waiting In Line...
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200406/064.htm
What's On Elsewhere...
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200406/065.htm
What Signs Do When You're Not Watching...
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200406/066.htm
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FUN PAGE
I'm Scottish so I love a bargain. I also love the
internet
so it's only natural that I love EBay too. It's
great for a
bargain...
But some people just go TOO far, I found this and
it makes
me feel normal. It also makes me feel sorry for
the poor
guy that has to live with her.
My Mom Is Insane...
http://www.ezines4all.com/links/insane.htm
When you're finished with that...
BlackViper...
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/snake/play.htm
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DeskTop Master.
Helps you install and organise your desktop themes
and
wallpaper.
Preview your wallpapers before you activate them.
Changes yor Wallpaper at Random from your
wallpaper files.
Make your own themes and save them.
http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/mad01
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BRAZIL VS SCOTLAND
It is just before Scotland v Brazil at the next
World Cup
Group game. Ronaldo goes into the Brazilian
changing room
to find all his team mates looking a bit
glum."What's up?"
he asks.
"Well, we're having trouble getting motivated for
this
game. We know it's important but it's only
Scotland.
They're shit and we can't be bothered".
Ronaldo looks at them and says "Well, I reckon I
can beat
these by myself, you lads go down the pub."
So Ronaldo goes out to play Scotland by himself
and the
rest of the Brazilian team go off for a few jars.
After a
few pints they wonder how the game is going, so
they get
the landlord to put the teletext on. A big cheer
goes up
as the screen reads
"Brazil 1 - Scotland 0 (Ronaldo 10minutes)".
He is beating Scotland all by himself! Anyway, a
few more
pints later and the game is forgotten until
someone remembers
"It must be full time now, let's see how he got
on". They put
the teletext on.
"Result from the Stadium: Brazil 1(Ronaldo 10
minutes) -
Scotland 1(Angus McSh*t 89minutes).
They can't believe it, he has single handedly got
a draw
against Scotland!!
They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him.
They
find him in the dressing room, still in his gear,
sat with
his head in his hands.
He refuses to look at them. "I've let you down,
I've let you
down."
"Don't be daft, you got a draw against Scotland ,
all by
yourself. And they only scored at the very very
end!"
"No, No, I have, I've let you down... I got sent
off after
12 minutes!!!
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Are you a smoker 21 or older? Click here to enter
to win a
Flat Screen TV and 2 Massage Chairs worth $5000!
http://mocda3.com/1/c/22998/165241/359064/359064
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ACCURATE DAVE
There was a man named Dave who got a new job. His
fellow
employees always met for a round of golf every
Saturday.
They asked Dave to meet them at 10:00 Saturday
morning. Dave
replied that he would love to meet them, but he
might be 6
minutes late.
On Saturday morning Dave was there at exactly
10:00. He
golfed right handed and won the round.
Following Saturday rolls around, and Dave says
that he will
be there, but he may be 6 minutes late again. He
shows up
right on time, golf's left handed, and wins the
round.
This continues for the next few weeks, with Dave
always
saying that he may be 6 minutes late, and then
always
winning the round golfing, either left or right
handed.
The other employees are getting tired of this, and
decided
to ask him what the deal was. They said, "Dave,
every
Saturday you say you may be six minutes late. You
never
are. Then you show up and golf with either right
handed or
left handed, and always win. What is up with
that?"
Dave replies, "Well, I am a very superstitious
kind of guy.
Every Saturday when I wake up, I look over at my
wife. If
she is sleeping on her left side, I golf left
handed... If
she is sleeping on her right side, I golf right
handed."
"Well," one of the employees questioned, "What
happens if
she is laying on her back?"
Dave replies, "Then I would be 6 minutes late."
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What do you have to say? When you participate in
Greenfield
Online surveys you will find that your opinion
matters.
Join now and you’ll be entered into the New Member
Drawing that includes a grand prize of $2,500
cash.
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