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====> Welcome to JokesUncut
=====> Seriously Scottish Adult Jokes For The
Whole Clan
======> Owned by http://www.GreatWorldMedia.com
=======> Unsubscribe Instructions at the bottom
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Mr. Wonderful Talking Romantic Doll!
Press his hand and he says 16 different things to
make you
feel you are the most wonderful woman on Earth:
"You know honey, why don't you just relax and let
me make
dinner tonight."
"The ball game isn't really that important, I'd
rather
spend time with you."
"Why don't we go to the mall, didn't you want some
new shoes?"
"You know, I think it's really important that we
talk
about our relationship."
"You've been on my mind all day. That's why I
bought you
these flowers."
Click below to listen to him online before you
buy:
http://www.greatworldmedia.com/gagsplus03.htm
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INTRODUCTION:
From time to time you get something that is just
so so
brilliant that you have to share it with everyone
you know.
Today is one of those days where I have something
to share
with each of you. Now... this really is a cracker.
http://www.ezines4all.com/pics/cracker.htm
Have a great day and don't take life too
seriously!
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
80-year old Bessie bursts into the rec room at the
retirement home. She holds her clenched fist in
the air and
announces, "Anyone who can guess what's in my hand
can have
sex with me tonight!!" An elderly gentleman in the
rear
shouts out, "An elephant?" Bessie thinks a minute
and says,
"Close enough."
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CARTOON TIME:
Milking A Bull...
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200406/010.htm
Spinning On A Pole...
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200406/011.htm
Female Exercise Incentive...
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200406/012.htm
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FUN PAGE
Dog Owners Watch Out...
http://www.ezines4all.com/pics/dogowners.htm
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If you want to learn Photoshop fast and you want
to do it
without reading boring books or going to expensive
classes
then this might be the most important letter you
read all
year.
Here's what this is all about:
Now you can learn Photoshop in less than 2 hours
thanks to
newly released, interactive video tutorials that
play on
your computer screen. You don't even need to own
the
Photoshop software to use these videos. Everything
you
need to learn Photoshop is included.
http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/jgardeners
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DICK TATTOOS
There's this guy who loves his girlfriend so much
he decides to
have her name tattooed on his dick. It said "WY"
when it was
soft, and "Wendy" when it was hard.
A few months later the couple get married. For
their honeymoon
they take a trip to a Caribbean island resort.
Once there, they
decide to go to a nude beach.
While strolling on the beach, the guy sees a local
man with the
letters "WY" on his dick too.
The tourist walks up to the local, points at
tattoo on his unit
and asks,
"Hey, is your girlfriend's name Wendy too?"
The man says with a thick Island accent,
"No mon, mine says, 'Welcome To The Island, Have A
Nice Day'."
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"You Can Easily Make Creative, Interesting Window
Valances
That Look Like You Paid a Professional Thousands
of
Dollars To Make..."
Looking to decorate your windows?
Give Me 5 Minutes And I'll Show You How
You Can Make Your Very Own Window Valances
Step-By-Step
and Save Thousands of Dollars Doing It
http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/sewhomedec
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PENIS TRANSPLANT
A man had a bad case of stuttering. He went to
many doctors
over the years, but none of them could help him.
Finally one
doctor said to him "I believe I found the reason
for your
stuttering". The man asked, "Wha.. wha.. wha..what
is my
pro.. pro.. problem."
The doctor replied, "Your penis is very, very
large. The
weight of your penis is causing a strain on your
larynx,
and this results in your stuttering. The only
solution to
this is to perform a penis transplant." The man
was really
tired of his stuttering, so he agreed to a
transplant.
Several days later the doctor called the man up
and
informed him that they have found a suitable
donor. The
transplant operation was successfully performed
and the man
could speak without any stutter.
At first he was happy, but after a while he began
to miss
his large penis, and how the girls used to love
it. He
finally went back to his doctor and said, "Doctor,
I am
grateful for the opportunity you have given me to
speak
without a stutter, but I miss my old penis. Please
find
the transplant donor and tell him that we have to
exchange
penises back."
The doctor shook his head and replied, "That's im..
im..
im.. impo.. impossible."
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Double The Speed Of Your PC
Discover some of the most amazing secrets to speed
up and
optimize your PC that you will ever learn, you can
do
everything in this report without spending a
single cent on
hardware and I will show you exactly how in these
two main
categories:
1) Hardware Optimization - e.g. CPU, modem, hard
disk, CD
drive, memory etc...
(2) Software Optimization - e.g. Internet
Explorer, Outlook,
Media Player, Office 2000 etc...
http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/sanderson
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