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====> Welcome to JokesUncut
=====> Seriously Scottish Adult Jokes For The
Whole Clan
======> Owned by http://www.GreatWorldMedia.com
=======> Unsubscribe Instructions at the bottom
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INTRODUCTION:
Hello folks, not posted very often recently as I
have really
bad list hosting problems, if anyone knows of an
alternative
then send me an email. Suggestions such as topic
and
yahoogroups aren't needed... they won't allow
people to
import an existing list. Most other options are
too
expensive as this list is fairly big and revenue
is less
than list hosting costs.
One thing I don't have a problem with is web
hosting, I have
the best web hosting and can get you a great deal
if you
send me your requirements no matter how small or
massive,
even if you haven't got a domain or site yet but
are serious
then help is at hand.
Phil (mailto:mrx@ezines4all.com)
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QUICK JOKE
What is worse than a dead dog on your piano?
An infected pussy on your organ.
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CARTOON TIME:
Attitude Problem?...
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200310/013.htm
No Smoking Sign...
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200310/014.htm
My Deepest Sympathy...
http://www.ezines4all.com/at200310/015.htm
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FUN PAGE
Donkey Kong...
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/donkeykong.html
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Spice Mice - Little Mice, Big Personalities!
The Spice Mice were a smash hit when Regis Philbin
brought
them onto his Live with Regis and Kathy show - the
audience
actually applauded wildly when they saw them in
action!...
You squeeze these little guys and gals and they
talk and
sing, and they are pretty funny.
7 styles to choose from with more arriving each
month -
collect them all!
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WILL POWER
Morty arrives home from work and as soon as he
sets
foot in the house, Sadie is on to him, telling him
that their friend Marvin has finally quit smoking.
"Imagine that, Morty," she says, "someone who
smoked 3
packs a day for 20 years has stopped smoking all
of a
sudden. Now that's what I call will power -
something
that you definitely don't have."
But Sadie hadn't finished.
"And that's not all. I hear that Bernie, that
drunken
friend of yours, is finally giving up drinking -
another example of the kind of will power that you
don't have."
"OK, Sadie," said Morty, "you want to see will
power,
do you? Well here's will power. I am going to
sleep in
the spare room from now on. I am going to prove to
you
that I won't be affected at all by not sleeping
with a
woman."
Morty keeps to his word.
One night, when he had been sleeping alone for a
week,
there is a knock on his bedroom door.
Morty shouts out, "What do you want?"
Sadie replies, "Marvin has started smoking again."
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A CATS TAIL
I was driving my car down a side street the other
day when
all of a sudden this cat jumped out in front of
me. I hit
the brakes, but I heard a thump, so I stopped.
There was the
cat lying right in the road. It was still alive,
but I
apparently had run over its tail and the force of
the tire
had cut it off.
A lady came running out of a house screaming, "You
killed my
cat!!"
I told her, "No, he's O. K., except for the tail,
and I'll
fix that."
I went into the trunk of my car and got out a roll
of duct
tape and taped the cat's tail back on.
The lady immediately blushed and called the cops.
A cop
showed up and immediately gave me a ticket.
Boy, was I pissed off. I had to go to court, and
was
convicted.
What a bummer. All for retailing pussy in a
residential area.
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