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=====> Seriously Scottish Clean Jokes For The
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INTRODUCTION:
Sorry I wasn't able to post yesterday as I was
quite ill,
fortunately I managed to stay out of the hospital
and
think I'm probably going to be ok.
On a much much brighter note, all the digging the
heals in
and all the prayers about the new apartment have
paid off.
We received a phone call today with an offer...
not of an
apartment... but of a house. We went to see it and
it was
even better than what I was looking for. It has a
great
big garden in three sections. A good sized dining
kitchen
with plenty of worktops and storage, two double
bedrooms
both with plenty of storage... actually everywhere
you
looked in the house there seemed to be lots of
storage.
We even got to keep the previous tenants vertical
blinds
and carpets for free... which saves quite a lot of
money!
There's a nice big walk in shower as well.
So now I'm happy about the house and stressed
about moving,
but the great thing is hopefully that'll be us
nice and
settled.
Have a great day... I have had one!
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
I enjoy using the comedy technique of
self-deprecation -
but I'm not very good at it.
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CARTOON TIME:
Santa's Transport
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Air Conditioning Installation
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200412/005.htm
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FUN PAGE
Fishy
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/fishy.htm
Big Smile
http://www.ezines4all.com/pics/bigsmile.htm
Random Fun Page...
http://www.ezines4all.com/fun/random.htm
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THE MILLIONAIRE WITH ALLIGATORS
Once there was a millionaire, who collected live
alligators.
He kept them in the pool, back of his mansion. The
millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was
single.
One day he decides to throw a huge party, and
during the
party he announces, "My dear guests...I have a
proposition
to every man here. I will give one million dollars
or my
daughter to the man who can swim across this pool
full of
alligators and emerge unharmed!"
As soon as he finished his last word, there was
the sound of
a large SPLASH!! There was a guy in the pool
swimming with
all he could...the crowd cheered him on as he kept
stroking.
Finally, he made it to the other side unharmed.
The
millionaire was impressed.
He said, "My boy, that was incredible! Fantastic!
I didn't
think it could be done! Well I must keep my end of
the
bargain...do you want my daughter or the one
million
dollars?"
The guy says, "Listen, I don't want your money!
And I don't
want your daughter! I want the person who pushed
me in that
WATER!!!"
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INTELLECT
A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a blonde
gathering, and
his hostess naturally broached the subject in
which the
doctor was most at ease. "Would you mind telling
me,
Doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental
deficiency in
somebody who appears completely normal?"
"Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask him a
simple
question which everyone should answer with no
trouble. If he
hesitates, that puts you on the track."
"What sort of question?"
"Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three
trips
around the world and died during one of them.
Which one?'
The blonde thought a moment, then said with a
nervous laugh,
"You wouldn't happen to have another example would
you? I
must confess I don't know much about history."
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