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====> Welcome to DafterLafter
=====> Seriously Scottish Clean Jokes For The
Whole Clan
======> Owned by http://www.GreatWorldMedia.com
=======> Unsubscribe Instructions at the bottom
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INTRODUCTION:
I hope you all had a great weekend, all to sadly
Monday
comes to creep back upon us very quickly.
Work hard all week... I'm sure the rewards will be
worth it!
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
John, a neighbor of mine, was annoyed because he
had to
search for his newspaper each morning after the
paperboy
tossed it. Often he would find it, covered with
dirt, under
the car in the gravel driveway.
Then one day the paperboy's mother mentioned that
her son's
ambition was to play professional basketball.
John had an idea. When he got home, he attached a
basketball hoop to a post on the front porch. Sure
enough,
the next morning there was a resounding "plunk" as
the
newspaper sailed through the hoop and landed by
the door.
John never had to search for his paper again.
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CARTOON TIME:
Why Microsoft Call It Windows
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200409/079.htm
The New Swiss Army Gun
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200409/080.htm
A Plane In A Plane
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200409/081.htm
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FUN PAGE
Best Positions In Bed - Not What You Think!...
http://www.ezines4all.com/pics/positions.htm
This is basically a water-skiing game:
Wakeboarding...
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/wakeboarding/index.htm
Random Fun Page...
http://www.ezines4all.com/fun/random.htm
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TESTS POSITIVE
The blond had been married about a year when one
day
she came running up to her husband jumping for
joy. Not
knowing how to react, the husband started jumping
up and
down along with her.
"Why are we so happy?" he asked.
"Honey, I have some really great news for you!"
She
said.
"Great" he said, "tell me what you're so happy
about".
She stopped jumping and was breathless from all
the
jumping up and down.
"I'm pregnant!" she gasped.
The husband was ecstatic as they had been trying
for a
while.
He grabbed her, kissed her, and started telling
her
how wonderful it was, and that he couldn't be
happier.
Then she said "Oh, honey there's more."
"What do you mean more?", he asked.
"Well we are not having just one baby, we are
going
to have TWINS!"
Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting
pregnant, he asked her how she knew.
"It was easy" she said, "I went to the pharmacy
and
bought the 2 pack home pregnancy test kit and both
tests came out positive!"
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YOUR WIFE GETS DOUBLE
After 28 years of marriage to the cruelest,
meanest, and
heartless wife a man could ever have, a Vermont
dairy farmer
takes his remaining $12,000 of a $1.5 million
divorce
settlement (including the farm), he decides to
fulfill his
life-long dream of traveling to Egypt. While
hiking around
the pyramids, he stumbles upon a lamp.
Like a typical American, he rubs the lamp. As the
story goes,
a Genie POPS out of the lamp!
Genie: "What has brought you to awaken me from my
long
slumber?"
Farmer: "I recently got divorced from my
less-than-wonderful
wife."
Genie: "DIVORCE? Because you're divorced, whatever
you wish
for, you wife gets double."
Farmer: "You got to be kiddin' me! She already got
everything!"
Genie: "Sorry, those are the rules."
Farmer: "Alright, if that's the way it's gonna be,
for my
first wish, I would like $100 million."
Genie: "Your wish is my command! ...but your wife
now has
$200 million."
Farmer: "That's fine. I can live with that. For my
second
wish, I want the biggest mansion on Lake
Champlain."
Genie: "Your wish is my command! ....but your wife
now
has 2 mansions on Lake Champlain."
Farmer: "Mmmmmm....now for my THIRD wish!
...............
...Genie, for my third wish I would like you to
beat
me HALF to death."
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