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====> Welcome to DafterLafter
=====> Seriously Scottish Clean Jokes For The
Whole Clan
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INTRODUCTION:
I went to visit my old school today for the first
time in
eight years. Lots of the old (even older now)
teachers
are still there and they remembered me very
well...
based on the looks of horror on their faces and
the way
they turned round and started to run away. It's
strange
how they remember pupils as it's easier for
pupils...
you have have a maximium of around 50 teachers to
remember
from your school career where as teachers can have
up to
3000!
Take care and have a great day!
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
A good piece of chocolate has about 200 calories.
As I
enjoy 2 servings per night, and a few more on
weekends, I
consume about 3,500 calories of chocolate in a
week, which
equals one pound of weight per week.
Therefore, in the last 3-1/2 years, I have had
chocolate
caloric intake of about 180 pounds, and I only
weigh 165
pounds.
So... without chocolate, I would have wasted away
to
nothing about 3 months ago! I owe my life to
chocolate!!
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CARTOON TIME:
Innocent Until Proven Guilty
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200409/058.htm
Lead For A Spoiled Dogs
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200409/059.htm
Cat Caught Out
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200409/060.htm
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FUN PAGE
The Seven Wonders Of The World
http://www.ezines4all.com/pics/7wonders.htm
Mission To Mars
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/mission/index.htm
How To Keep An Idiot Busy...
http://www.ezines4all.com/fun/idiot.htm
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SOAP AND WATER
After several exciting dates, Jim invited Tina
over to his
house for a home-cooked dinner.
When she sat down at the table, she noticed that
the dishes
were the dirtiest that she had ever seen in her
life.
"Have these dishes ever been washed?" Tina asked,
running
her fingers over the grit and grime.
Jim replied, "They're as clean as soap and water
could get
them."
Tina felt a bit apprehensive, but started eating.
It was
really delicious and she said so, despite the
dirty dishes.
When dinner was over, Jim took the dishes outside,
whistled
and yelled, "Here, Soap! Here, Water!"
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GOING TO PASADENA
An idiot was waiting in the down-town L. A. bus
station for
the bus to Pasadena. He spotted a machine with a
sign that
read:
YOUR HEIGHT, YOUR WEIGHT, YOUR FORTUNE $1.00
He stepped on the scale and dropped a dollar bill
in the
slot. Out came a card that said: "You are 5 feet
10 inches
tall. You weigh 160 pounds, and you are waiting
for the bus
to Pasadena."
The idiot said, "How did that machine know that?
Well, I'll
fool it."
He went downstairs to the men's room, rolled up
his coat
collar, pulled down the brim of his hat, and put
on a fake
beard. He tiptoed back up the stairs, sneaked
along the
wall, spun around and jumped on the scale and
quickly placed
another dollar in the slot.
Out came a card that read: "You are 5 feet 10
inches tall,
you weigh 160 pounds, and while you were messing
around down
in the men's room, you missed the bus to
Pasadena."
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