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====> Welcome to DafterLafter
=====> Seriously Scottish Clean Jokes For The
Whole Clan
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INTRODUCTION:
We went to view an apartment today. The rent is
less than
our current apartment and it's more permenant as
it's from
the local authority and not a private landlord
however it's
quite a bit smaller... especially the kitchen and
bathroom.
The storage seems to be a problem as there are
hardly any
cupboards in the kitchen and very little worktop
space...
There is no cupboard or even surface in the
bathroom and
it 'seems' like it would be impossible to plumb in
a shower
over the bath due to terrible planning. The decor
is
absolutely horrible... I've never seen anything so
bad.
Also there's no room for a dining table and
chairs. Lizzie
is very keen to take it as she wants somewhere 'permenant'
where we can set up home... and there's the
possibility
of buying it at a discount in a few years time...
and
we're not going to be offered anywhere better.
Then again,
we'd have to get it all totally redecorated, gut
the
kitchen and redesign it to make use of what little
space
there is, get a completely new bathroom (with a
shower
if possible) which would involve tiles etc... then
we
have to get floor coverings for the entire place
as it's
just horrible cheap floorboards... so carpets
would be
needed and they don't come cheap. The kitchen
would need
appliances and they cost money... then there's all
the
furniture... then I get back to the problem of
where to
put everything. Right now are kitchen has
literally
fifteen times as much storage as the new one....
and
four times the worktop space. The way I see it
I'll
have to shell out a fortune I don't have for an
apartment which is going to lower my standard of
living.
Lizzie sees it differently and if we turn down the
apartment I'm the one who'll be in the doghouse
for
the rest of eternity... grrrrrrrr, I hate
decisions.
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
Two friends were beginning a game of golf.
The first man stepped up to the tee, hit the ball,
and
scored a hole-in-one.
The other man said, "Now I'll take MY practice
swing,
and then we'll start the game."
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CARTOON TIME:
Drinking Like A Dog
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200409/049.htm
A Missed Photo Opportunity
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200409/050.htm
Natural Beauty
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200409/051.htm
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FUN PAGE
Are you a Redneck?
http://www.jokesunlimited.com/cltr.php?id=128
Frogger
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/frogger.html
Dog Owners Warning
http://www.ezines4all.com/pics/dogowners.htm
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BRAKE FLUID
One day this mechanic was working late under a car
and some brake
fluid dripped into his mouth. Wow! That stuff
isn't too bad tasting,
he thought.
Next day he told his buddy about tasting the brake
fluid. "Not bad,"
he said. "Think I'll have a little more today."
His friend got a
little concerned but didn't say anything.
Next day he told about drinking a cup full of the
brake fluid. Great
stuff! Think I'll have some more today. And so he
did.
A few days later he was up to a bottle a day, and
told his friend
that brake fluid is really great stuff. His friend
was now really
worried. "You know that brake fluid is poison and
really bad for you.
You better stop drinking that."
"Hey, no problem," he said, ... "I can stop any
time."
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If you want to learn Photoshop fast and you want
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you
need to learn Photoshop is included.
http://hop.clickbank.net/?LABLaughs/jgardeners
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REATTACHED
Sam and John were out cutting wood, and John cut
his arm off. Sam
wrapped the arm in a plastic bag and took it and
John to a surgeon. The
surgeon said, "You're in luck! I'm an expert at
reattaching limbs! Come
back in four hours." So Sam came back in four
hours and the surgeon
said, "I got done faster than I expected to. John
is down at the local
pub." Sam went to the pub and saw John throwing
darts. A few weeks
later, Sam and John were out again, and John cut
his leg off. Sam put
the leg in a plastic bag and took it and John back
to the surgeon. The
surgeon said, "Legs are a little tougher - come
back in six hours." Sam
returned in six hours and the surgeon said, "I
finished early - John's
down at the soccer field." Sam went to the soccer
field and there was
John, kicking goals. A few weeks later, John had a
terrible accident
and cut his head off. Sam put the head in a
plastic bag and took it and
the rest of John to the surgeon. The surgeon said,
"Gee, heads are
really tough. Come back in twelve hours." So Sam
returned in twelve
hours and the surgeon said, "I'm sorry, John
died." Sam said, "I
understand - heads are tough." The surgeon said,
"Oh, no! The surgery
went fine! John suffocated in that plastic bag!"
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