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====> Welcome to DafterLafter
=====> Seriously Scottish Clean Jokes For The
Whole Clan
======> Owned by http://www.GreatWorldMedia.com
=======> Unsubscribe Instructions at the bottom
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INTRODUCTION:
Someone I know had a birthday recently so I made
her a
lovely card which I thought I'd share with you. If
anyone
you know has a birthday coming soon then feel free
to share
this card with them.
http://www.ezines4all.com/pics/happybirthday.htm
Take care and have a fantastic day!
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
"What they put women through today when they're
having a baby!
They don't want to medicate them, as compared to
previous
generations. When my mom had me, she had so much
medication, she
didn't wake up till I was seven."
- Dennis Wolfberg
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CARTOON TIME:
Long Waits At The Doctors
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200408/055.htm
Please Pull Over
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200408/056.htm
Cat Culinary Skills
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200408/057.htm
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FUN PAGE
Todays game is really fun to play but is
annoyingly
difficult for a game which 'seems' so easy.
Space Fighter...
http://www.ezines4all.com/spacefighter/index.htm
Random Fun Page...
http://www.ezines4all.com/fun/random.htm
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BUREAUCRACY
A few months ago, when I was picking up the
children at school, another
mother I knew well, rushed up to me. Emily was
fuming with indignation. "Do
you know what you and I are?" she demanded. Before
I could answer - and I
didn't really have one handy - she blurted out the
reason for her question.
It seemed she had just returned from renewing her
driver's license at the
County Clerk's office. Asked by the woman recorder
to state her
"occupation," Emily had hesitated, uncertain how
to classify herself. "What I
mean is," explained the recorder, "do you have a
job, or are you just a
.?" "Of course I have a job," snapped Emily. "I'm
a mother." "We don't
list 'mother' as an occupation...'housewife'
covers it," said the recorder
emphatically.
I forgot all about her story until one day I found
myself in the same
situation, this time at our own Town Hall. The
Clerk was obviously a career
woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a
high-sounding title, like
"Official Interrogator" or "Town Registrar."
"And what is your occupation?" she probed. What
made me say it, I do not
know. The words simply popped out. "I'm....a
Research Associate in the field
of Child Development and Human Relations." The
clerk paused, ball-point pen
frozen in midair, and looked up as though she had
not heard right. I
repeated the title slowly, emphasizing the most
significant words. Then I
stared with wonder as my pompous pronouncement was
written in bold, black ink
on the official questionnaire. "Might I ask," said
the clerk with new
interest, "just what you do in your field?"
Coolly, without any trace of
fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, "I have
a continuing program of
research (what mother doesn't) in the laboratory
and in the field (normally I
would have said indoors and out). I'm working for
my Masters (the whole
darned family) and
already have four credits (all daughters). Of
course, the job is one of the
most demanding in the humanities (any mother care
to disagree?) and I often
work 14 hours a day (24 is more like it). But the
job is more challenging
than most run-of-the-mill
careers and the rewards are in satisfaction rather
than just money." There
was an increasing note of respect in the clerk's
voice as she completed the
form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the
door.
As I drove into our driveway buoyed up by my
glamorous new career, I was
greeted by my lab assistants--age 13, 7, and 3.
And upstairs, I could hear
our new experimental model (six months) in the
child-development program,
testing out a new vocal pattern.
I felt triumphant. I had scored a beat on
bureaucracy! And I had gone down
on the official records as someone more
distinguished and indispensable to
mankind than "just another......"
Home...what a glorious career. Especially when
there's a title on the door!
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Have you noticed your computer running slower than
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FUNNY SIGNS
1. IN A LAUNDROMAT: Automatic washing machines.
Please remove
all your clothes when the light goes out.
2. IN AN OFFICE: Would the person who took the
step ladder
yesterday kindly bring it back or further steps
will be taken.
3. OUTSIDE A SECOND-HAND SHOP: We exchange
anything - bicycles,
washing machines etc. Why not bring your wife
along and get a
wonderful bargain.
4. NOTICE IN A DRY CLEANER'S WINDOW: Anyone
leaving their
garments here for more than 30 days will be
disposed of.
5. SPOTTED IN A SAFARI PARK: Elephants Please Stay
In Your Car
6. ON A REPAIR SHOP DOOR: We can repair anything
(Please knock
hard on the door - the bell doesn't work)
7. SPOTTED IN A TOILET IN A LONDON OFFICE BLOCK:
Toilet out
of order. Please use floor below.
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If you want to learn Photoshop fast and you want
to do it
without reading boring books or going to expensive
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