DafterLafter - 20 August 2004

 

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

====> Welcome to DafterLafter
=====> Seriously Scottish Clean Jokes For The Whole Clan
======> Owned by http://www.GreatWorldMedia.com
=======> Unsubscribe Instructions at the bottom

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

Should The USA Pull Out Of Iraq?

Your Opinion Could Be Worth $1000!

The big question of the day is whether or not the USA should
pull out of Iraq. To encourage you to share your opinions
we're offering $1000 to one lucky reader.

To vote please visit:

http://www.ezines4all.com/links/iraq.htm

<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-

INTRODUCTION:

Please visit the ad above to vote on whether or not the USA
should pull out of Iraq and maybe your opinion could earn
you a nice $1000 cash prize.

^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-

QUICK JOKE

A 55-year old man, who was born on May 5th, has been married
5 years, has 5 children, makes $55,555.55 a year, and who's
lucky number is 5, receives a phone call from a friend. This
friend informs the man that a horse named Lucky 5 will be
running in the fifth race at the local track that evening,
August 5.

Excitedly, the man withdraws $5,555.55 cash from his bank
account, goes to the races and bets on Lucky 5.

Yup! Sure enough... the horse comes in fifth.

^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-

CARTOON TIME:

Glasses Show Your Wisdom
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200407/058.htm

Answers Can Be Found In The Strangest Of Places
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200407/059.htm

Did You Comb Your Hair Today?
http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200407/060.htm

^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-

FUN PAGE

Me Mudder...
http://www.ezines4all.com/pics/mudder.htm

I found a great page that lets you 'Build Your Own Bush'.

It's really funny as you can mess around with different
hairstyles, eyes, smiles and facial hair for George Bush
and see what he'd look like.

Check it out at
http://www.ezines4all.com/links/buildbush.htm

^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-

<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

Get Your Free Gift!

Casio 3" Handheld Color TV

This handheld TV has a 3" anti-glare color screen and
utilizes Active Matrix technology to deliver the clearest
possible image, no matter where you are.

Grab your free TV before someone else does!

Shipping included.

Click Here Now!
http://clicks.emarketmakers.com/redir.aspx?id=303615

<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-

HEAVENLY HELP

Once upon a time there was a giant flood that ravaged a
small town. Everyone evacuated except one lady who stayed
on her roof. As the police came by telling everyone to
abandon their houses she said, "No, whatever happens I know
God will look after me."

The flood grew stronger and after a while a boat came by
and a man screamed "Get in the boat, I'll rescue you!" The
lady yelled back, "No thanks, God will take care of me,
whatever happens!"

A few hours later a helicopter hovered above her house and
dropped a rope ladder and they yelled "C'mon lady, get on
the ladder!" With her house almost entirely under water she
screamed back, "No, I'm staying here, God will take care of
me, whatever happens!" And so the helicopter left.

A few hours later the lady drowned.

At heavens gate she asked God, "I don't understand, I prayed
and prayed for you to take care of me, what happened?" God
replied, "I sent a police man, a boat, and a helicopter,
what more could I do!"

^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-

<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

Stop wasting money on cigarettes! Let FreshCartons show you
the way. Join our discount shopping club and start saving
money on cigarettes!

Marlboro cartons....$14.95
Camel cartons.......$14.95
Winston and Salem...$14.95

Free Shipping on all orders

Click the following link to start saving!

http://clicks.emarketmakers.com/redir.aspx?id=303643

<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-

DUMB GUYS

OK, so there are 3 guys, and they are walking down the
beach, when they find an old barnacle-encrusted bottle
laying on the shore. One of the guys, says "Hey look. It's
a bottle hehe", and he picks it up and throws it. It cracks
against a nearby palm tree, and a blinding flash of white
light engulfs them. A deep voice says, "I am a Genie. I
have been trapped in that bottle for over a millenium. You
have freed me and it is all I can do to give you each 1
wish. Of anything you desire."

So the first guy is pretty bewlidered, but he thinks
(something he has not done in quite a while) and says
"uhhh... I wanna be 2 times smarter yup..."

So the genie grants his wish and he becomes two times
smarter, and begins to recite the multiplication tables.

The genie turns to the other guy, who was slightly smarter
than the first one, and asks him what he wants. The man
replies, "Well, I don't want to be stupider than HE is, so
let me be 10 times smarter."

The genie grants his wish and he suddenly is able to recite
any word out of the dictionary, and can practically do
anything!

The genie turns to the last guy and asks HIM what his wish
is. The guy thinks hard for a moment, and the perfect wish
comes to him.

He says proudly, "I want to be 100 times smarter than I am
now."

The genie looks at him uncertainly, and tries to persuade
him to wish for something else. The man gets angry, and
says "MAKE ME 100 TIMES SMARTER!!!!!!" the genie sighs,
and promptly turns him into a woman.

^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-

<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

World's Fastest Life Insurance Policy?

No Medical Exam Required!

Instant approval for qualified applicants and policy issue
online in 10 minutes or less!

http://clicks.emarketmakers.com/redir.aspx?id=303627 

American Life Direct is a secure website verified by
"VeriSign" and is also a member of the Better Business
Bureau.

No paperwork. No medical exam. No agents. No appointments.
No waiting. No kidding!

Got ten minutes? Get covered! Protect your family without
all the hassles.

http://clicks.emarketmakers.com/redir.aspx?id=303627

<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-

 

 

 

 

 

  

 



SUBSCRIBE TO THESE FREE EMAILS FROM Ezines4All.com
Tick the boxes of the lists you would like, place your email address into the space provided and then press the 'Submit' button.

JokesUncut

The 'pick' of all the newest and best ADULT jokes in the world... with daily commentary from that madman we like to call Mr-X

Click Here To Visit Homepage

DafterLafter

The 'pick' of all the newest and best CLEAN jokes in the world... with daily commentary from that madman we like to call Mr-X

Click Here To Visit Homepage

Buffalos G Jokes

Proof G doesn't mean stale, stuffy, or old. Good clean humor that can be shared with anyone. Be funny without being offensive or obscene. Try G-Jokes, your one stop clean humor connection.

Click Here To Visit Homepage

Buffalos Adult Jokes

A fresh batch of chips for you each morning. New jokes blended with those worth hearing again. Not for the easily offended or under 18 years old.

Click Here To Visit Homepage

More Great Lists From Our Partner Sites

LABLaughs Adult Jokes
Top quality Adult Humor from LABLaughs.com sent to your mailbox on a daily basis. This list is for grown-ups only!
Click Here To Visit Homepage
LABLaughs Clean Jokes
Top quality Clean Humor from LABLaughs.com sent to your mailbox on a daily basis. Fun which is suitable for all the family! Click Here To Visit Homepage
LABLaughs Adult Cartoons
A hilarious 'Adult' dirty cartoon from LABLaughs.com sent to you every day for viewing on the web, ideal to share with your friends! Click Here To Visit Homepage
LABLaughs Clean Cartoons
A funny 'Clean' cartoon, suitable for all, from LABLaughs sent to your daily for viewing on the web, ideal to share with your friends.
Click Here To Visit Homepage
LABLaughs Recipes
A mouth-watering recipe to tempt your every day. Whatever your tastes, you'll find something too add to your Recipe book.
Click Here To Visit Homepage
LABLaughs Inspiration
A daily piece of inspiration to bring a tear to your eye or a smile to your face. Usually as a poem or a short story. Get inspired today!
Click Here To Visit Homepage
LABLaughs Freebies
A great source to receive Free offers, samples of things, Vouchers, Promotional offers and much much more.
Click Here To Visit Homepage
LABLaughs Links
5 links to fun and useful sites on the internet sent every day. All links are checked to make sure that they're absolutely clean.
Click Here To Visit Homepage
LABLaughs Riddles
A daily riddle from LABLaughs to tax your brain... and distract you from your work. You can use these on your friends too!
Click Here To Visit Homepage
LABLaughs Trivia
Be a trivia buff and impress your friends with your useless info, you never know... it could help you win a gameshow!
Click Here To Visit Homepage
LABLaugh Files
A link to a funny file for you to download, either a sound clip, movie clip or an exe file, ideal to share with your friends!
Click Here To Visit Homepage
LynnLynn's Links
Surf the net with Lynn as she finds you the best links each day to guide you around the best sites the internet has to offer.
Click Here To Visit Homepage
Nekia's Adult Humor!
The BEST in Adult humor-Not raunchy just plain funny.
Toons included in every issue!
Over The Edge!
Xtreme Adult Humor! The name says it all! The best in "Oh My God!" Adult humor!
Aiken's One-Liners!
Five one line jokes that you can tell ANYBODY! They're clean, short and FUNNY
Click Here To Visit Homepage
Inspire
A traditional list that brings you inspirational material of all types. Promises to make you think, smile & ENJOY
Buffalo Lite
Lite Humor for people on the go. If you haven't go the time to sit and read the rest... spend a quick two minutes to read the best!
Click Here To Visit Homepage
A Laugh A Day!
The centerpost of CLEAN fun humor!  Trivia, toons, & 4 great jokes!

Click Here To Visit Homepage
No Holds Barred!
Anything goes with the best in adult humor! Not trashy kids jokes but enjoyable outrageous laughs!
Pics-R-Uss!
A pic or toon direct to your in-box. Sent once a day, every day. Some adult content.
Jokes-R-Uss
Sent out every 4-5 days. Jokes, Fun stuff, and you can try to answer "Jays Brain Teaser".
Wavs-R-Uss
For adults who enjoy funny Songs/Parodies 4-5 times a week.
Your List Here?
Email
mrx@ezines4all.com for details of how to get your list here by joining our program where you run links to this site in your ezine.
Your List Here?
Email
mrx@ezines4all.com for details of how to get your list here by joining our program where you run links to this site in your ezine.

YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS:

Click Here For Our Full Index

If you've enjoyed this page then please be kind and visit our sponsors.

WHY NOT VISIT THESE OTHER GREAT SITES?

LOL Funny Pictures GagsPlus
Funny Videos! Stupid People
Celebrity Pics Cartoons By Gaspritz
Optical Illusions Extreme Funny Pictures
Valentine Cards Randon Fun Pages
Funny Funny Pictures Anti-Bored.com
Joke Email Celebrity Mugshots
HighSchoolHumor.com Aikens Laughs
Flash Cartoons FunFry.com
2funnypictures Pick The Worst
Humping Frog Funny Adult Jokes
Face War! Joke Around
Embarrassing Stories Info On Everything
Free ECards LABLaughs
Song Lyrics Buddy Icons
G-Wash.com Icon Planet
Quick Bites Recipes Joke Stop
More Links Your Link Here?

Please visit out other sites:
http://www.lablaughs.com - 11 Fun Email Lists with Massive Archives
 
http://www.yourlasthost.com - Fast, Affordable, Reliable Hosting... low cost Bandwidth
http://www.yourlisthost.com - Great value, great delivery email list hosting!

http://www.greatworldmedia.com - Revenue Opportunities For Webmasters
http://www.ezines4all.com - Fun Pages and Cartoons


FREE Banner Exchange: Generous 5/4 ratio!
Email to ask for full info!