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====> Welcome to DafterLafter
=====> Seriously Scottish Clean Jokes For The
Whole Clan
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INTRODUCTION:
I'm on my own tonight as Lizzie has gone off to
live at her
own house for a few days... I like peace and quiet
from time
to time.
I decided to spend the afternoon sorting through
my huge
collection of plugs and cables that I'm sure are
useful for
something (which is why I'm keeping them) but I
just don't
know what. I must have about 100 and they were all
tangled
dreadfully with each other. I spent ages finding
different
ends of things and feeding them through then
making the
retrieved item neat and tidy before putting them
in a box
dedicated for that sort of thing.
I might sort through my collection of CDRs with no
labels
tomorrow.
Phil <--- Always willing to take on a challenge.
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QUICK JOKE
The board of education in a nearby town sold off a
building that had been a one-room schoolhouse. The
buyer converted it into a tavern. One day an
elderly
man was walking by the place with his grandson.
The old man pointed to the building and said,
"That's where I used to go to school."
"Really?" asked the boy. "Who was the bartender
then?"
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CARTOON TIME:
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What the "Titanic" Film Didn't Show...
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FUN PAGE
Detonator is a tricky little game which will cause
lots of
shreiks of annoyance because you know what you
want to do
but somehow keep screwing up... at least I did!
Detonator...
http://www.ezines4all.com/games/detonator/index.htm
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DINING OUT
The waitress comes over and recognizes the family
seated at
the table; Mr & Mrs Smith and their little son.
Jonathan.
She says, "Jonathan, what would you like?"
He says, "I'll have a grilled cheese sandwich."
She says, "Jonathan, I'm sorry, we don't serve
grilled
cheese sandwiches."
He says, "You have a grill, don't you?"
She says, "Yes."
He says, "You have cheese, don't you?"
She says, "Yes."
He says, "You have bread, don't you?"
She says, "Yes."
He says, "Well, I'll have a grilled cheese
sandwich."
This kid is three years old!!
The waitress says, "Jonathan, I'll go see if the
chef will
fix you a grilled cheese sandwich."
She comes back in a little while and says, "Okay,
Jonathan,
the chef agreed to fix you a grilled cheese
sandwich. I
forgot to ask you, though, what you want to
drink."
He says, "I'll have a milkshake."
She says, "Jonathan, your parents have probably
already told
you we don't serve milkshakes." She was ready for
him this
time. She says, "Now, it is true we have milk. And
it is
true we have ice cream. But we don't have the
syrup."
He says, "You have a car, don't you?"
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SHIFTING SAND
An Italian, a Scotsman and a Chinese fellow are
hired at a
construction site.
The foreman points out a huge pile of sand and
says to the
Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping."
To the Scotsman he says, "You're in charge of
shoveling."
And to the Chinese guy, "You're in charge of
supplies."
He then says, "Now, I have to leave for a little
while. I
expect you guys to make a dent in that there
pile."
So the foreman goes away for a couple hours and
when he
returns, the pile of sand is untouched. He asks
the Italian,
"Why didn't you sweep any of it?"
The Italian replies, "I no hava no broom. You
saida to the
Chinese a fella that he a wasa in a charge of
supplies, but
he hasa disappeared and I no coulda finda him
nowhere."
Then the foreman turns to the Scotsman and says,
"And you,
I thought I told you to shovel this pile."
The Scotsman replies, "Aye, ye did lad, boot ah
couldnay
get meself a shoovel! Ye left th' Chinese gadgie
in chairge
of supplies, boot ah couldnay fin' him either."
The foreman is really angry now and storms off
toward the
pile of sand to look for the Chinese guy ...
Just then, the Chinese guy leaps out from behind
the pile
of sand and yells . . . . . .
"SUPPLIES!"
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