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====> Welcome to DafterLafter
=====> Seriously Scottish Clean Jokes For The
Whole Clan
======> Owned by http://www.GreatWorldMedia.com
=======> Unsubscribe Instructions at the bottom
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INTRODUCTION:
I'm a little ill at the moment which has slowed me
down this
last week or so, hopefully I'll be up to full
throttle again
soon so that normal service may resume.
Phil
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QUICK JOKE
The school of agriculture's dean of admissions was
interviewing a prospective student, "Why have you
chosen
this career?" he asked.
"I dream of making a million dollars in farming,
like my
father," the student replied.
"Your father made a million dollars in farming?"
echoed the
dean much impressed.
"No," replied the applicant. "But he always
dreamed of it."
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PEST CONTROL
My husband works as a service technician for a
large
exterminating company.
One of the rules of the company is that he has to
comfirm
each appointment by phone the night before his
service call
to that household.
One evening he made such a call, and when a man
answered
the phone, he said,
"Hi, this is Gary from A to Z Pest Control
Company. Your
wife phoned us."
There was a long silence, and then my husband
heard the man
on the other end say,
"Honey, it's for you......someone wants to talk to
you
about your relatives."
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House Train Your Dog The Right Way... The First
Time
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HOW TO PREPARE NOW FOR NEXT WINTER'S SKI
SEASON....
10. Visit your local butcher and pay $10 to sit in
his
walk-in freezer for half an hour. Afterwards, burn
two $50
dollar bills to warm up.
9. Go to the nearest hockey rink and walk across
the ice
20 times in your ski boots carrying two pairs of
skis,
accessory bag and poles. Pretend you are looking
for your
car.
8. For ski boot simulation at home, put a pebble
in your
street shoes and tighten a C-clamp around your
toes.
7. Buy a pair of gloves and immediately throw one
away.
6. Go to McDonald's and insist on paying $6.50 for
a
hamburger. Be sure to wait in the longest line.
5. Clip a lift ticket to the zipper of your jacket
and
ride a motorcycle fast enough to make the ticket
lacerate your face.
4. Drive slowly for five hours - anywhere - as
long as
it's in a snowstorm and you're following an 18
wheeler.
3. Fill a blender with ice, hit the pulse button
and let
the spray blast your face. You'd almost believe
you're
skiing in front of a snowmaker!
2. Dress up in as many clothes as you can and then
proceed
to take them off because you have to go to the
bathroom.
1. Repeat all of the above every Saturday and
Sunday.
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Exploding Golf Ball
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